|
Bloc Party’s Underground- Resistance Is Futile Bloc Weekender festival organisers George and Alec ridiculed Skrufff for being ‘urbanite cosmopolitans’ this week after taking exception to hearing their event’s Hemsby-on-Sea’s Pontins holiday park location described as ‘grim and tacky’. “The holiday park is a magical addition to BLOC. Unless you haven’t noticed it before, this green and pleasant land can often be mistaken for a godforsaken rock in the middle of the North Sea and is prone to horrific weather throughout all seasons,” they complained, “Being able to snuggle down at 10AM in the morning, or belt back some shots in the heated indoor arenas by way of a snifter when you wake up 30 minutes later, is a real USP (unique selling point), let me tell you.” According to Pontin’s website, however, ‘bed linen is not provided in Budget accommodation’, while people staying in the premium ‘Club accommodation’ will feel ‘that extra bit special’ for having ‘Electricity included in the price’, suggesting snuggling down and even staying warm could be tricky for those unfamiliar with electricity meters. “The holiday park is a strange and wonderful British Institution, with a very individual aesthetic,” the Spartanist duo insisted, “Grimy and tacky are words that you urbanite cosmopolitans might like to bandy about – we simple folk prefer ‘fun’ and ‘prefabricated’.” The pair added that numerous performers (from the line-up which includes Dave Clarke, Black Dog, Underground Resistance, Joey Beltram, Red Snapper, Amon Tobin and Juan Atkins and hundreds more) will be staying on suite (in the Club rooms), offering the tantalising prospect of meeting Mad Mike swimming lengths in the pool, or commandeering the go-karts in between UR sets. “Loads of artists muck in, staying for the whole weekend and really buzz off the atmosphere. Several headline acts were found buggering about in the ball pit last year and a few had to be told off for jogging the 2p machines,” they revealed. “And as for Underground Resistance requiring 5 star accommodation and VIP transport, of course they have their own helicopter, and as anyone in the industry will tell you, the members of UR sleep by standing shoulder to shoulder in rigid single line formation, crossing their arms across chests and staring straight ahead with a defiant look on their faces, so it wasn’t an issue,” they pointed out. The promoters promised the March weekender will offer ‘a powerhouse of dynamic, forward-thinking underground music’ and will be ‘an ‘internationally visible showcase for the underground scene in the UK’ though said no-one should be put off by their counter-cultural credibility obsession. “Everyone who’s anyone is welcome, even if you are an incorrigible stiff,” they stressed,”So long as you know where the drudge stops and the fun starts, you’re OK with us. If you’re worried your job is laughably square and you won’t feel comfortable on the tastemaker laser-edge of post-millenial technoculture that is Hemsby-on-Sea, just do something self-consciously wacky like wearing your tie around your head Rambo style. Just do whatever feels natural,” they advised, “I don’t think many people live and work in the underground, apart from perhaps the teenaged mutant ninja turtles,” Alec mused. “Many people who attend BLOC have perfectly ordinary jobs, right the way through from Lollipop men to vivisectionists. What makes you underground is liking the right kind of music – you can find out what the ‘right’ kind of music is from lifestyle websites and podcasts littered across Popular Culture. As a rough guide, if you can’t whistle it, girls hate it and no-one’s heard of it – You’re In!
Skrufff (Jonty Skrufff): What criteria do you use to choose the line-up?
Bloc Weekender (George and Alec): “Ideally an act playing at BLOC will be a fine, upstanding gentleman from a good school (not bloody Harrow) with a flawless history of commercial and critical success, a widely known sense of fair play in his personal and professional life and a knockabout sense of humour. Charity work is a plus, but not essential and we’re not old-fashioned enough to insist that they’re married - but it doesn’t hurt either. However, as it gets closer to the date and we still haven’t got anyone who fits those exact specifications, we end up pretty much emptying the prisons to find rotten-hard acts who can fucking bang it out. And I suppose they’ll have to do.” Skrufff: Seems like some underground scenes not so represented (eg French dirty electro/ London club kid/ new rave, baile funk electro (eg Sinden/ herve/ switch type stuff): why not? Bloc Weekender (George): “Well, I think of this as the pre-packaged snack dilemma. You can’t buy a big bag of crisps that’s got one of every delicious baked corn snack in it – ultimately you have to centralize your satisfaction and dedicate yourself to a whole bag of one kind. Otherwise you’ll risk just teasing yourself half to death with a fraction of a flavoured mouthful of your favourite crisp before you move on to some other treat that you can’t enjoy properly before the next one after that comes along. That way madness lies. To enjoy something properly you need Focus, you need Dedication and ultimately you’ll be a better and more developed humanoid if you spurn the wafer-thin appeal of just touching the surface of everything and in fact get deeply involved with just the selection of things you can handle. In my example, crisps, in the case under discussion, splintered sub-genres in the spectrum of underground dance music. I hope that answers your question, as I’ve forgotten what it originally was. Can I have a bag of crisps please? Skrufff: How much do you view the underground as one big unified mass? Bloc Weekender (George): “I do view the underground as one big unified mass, certainly – but that’s also what I think about the universe and apparently I’m wrong about that. I do know that there are massive, organized fights in my area between people who like italo-disco and people who like minimal techno. But just like football hooligans from rival firms who put their differences aside to fight foreigners at international matches, they gang up together to beat up people who like drum & bass. So maybe the underground dance scene would all get together if there was a fight between, I don’t know, people who like underground dance music and people who like animals? Perhaps you need a common enemy to unite you into a unified mass. I don’t know really. We don’t allow fighting at BLOC. What does that tell you? Again, I don’t really know.” Skrufff : Are their any special VIP/ concierge facilities for weekend financial types planned? Bloc Weekender (George and Alec): “No, no, no. What a horrible idea. A special trailer for people who are prepared to stump up an extra fourteen pounds fifty pee, with complimentary pot pourri and supermarket own brand tea and coffee? Sounds rubbish, but you can guarantee you’d have some lipsticked tightjaw in a spray-on dress self importantly trying to gain entry if there was one.” Skrufff: What makes an event underground: is Glastonbury? Global Gathering? Creamfields? Bloc Weekender (George and Alex): “Underground ratings are as follows [official]: Glastonbury: used to be. Now shares the same underground credentials as a best Victoria Sponge competition in Guildford. Global Gathering: respect to Global Gathering. Five underground points. Creamfields: Fifty nine per cent underground. Skrufff: You're having a fancy dress bingo session: all the great underground scenes of the past (eg punk/ mod, two tone/ early rave) involved fashion- people dressing to put themselves as outsiders and to bond with each other: how important is image these days? Bloc Weekender (Alec): “An interesting question. Just to give you an idea of the kind of ground we’re breaking when it comes to image here in the BLOC office, let me share a little snapshot of the outfits we’re wearing for a regular Thursday afternoon. I’m typing out the answers to these questions prostrate on a chaise lounge wearing a cavalier’s hat from the English civil war, a leather tunic over a women’s woollen bathing suit and thigh-high waders, with patent leather toecaps. To my left, George is hanging from a tyre wearing a bright green wedding dress, an expensive designer straw hat and smoking unfiltered Gauloise with a sneer on his face. He only ever wears one shoe, in this instance a hob nailed boot from the industrial revolution. Our intern is in the corner making cups of Earl Grey, and is dressed like a pelican. His bare feet are adorned with spurs. Image is, to us, in a word, essential if we are to be taken seriously. We’re having a fancy dress bingo game to allow the BLOC family to express themselves in all their glory. If they all dress differently then we’ll find that those attending BLOC are glorious free spirits who cannot be constrained by the government, the establishment or their parents; if they all dress the same it will appear that we have established a cult.” Skrufff: Anything else to add? Bloc Weekender (George and Alex): “I think that I’ve said enough. But I will just leave a quick reminder to attend the BLOC weekend electronic music festival because it’s a fucking gas. When we announce the secret mystery headliner, your head will explode.” oss their chests and staring straight ahead with a defiant look on their faces, so it wasn’t an issue,” they pointed The underground-obsessed pair (the press release describes Bloc as ‘an internationally visible showcase for the underground scene in the UK’ offering ‘a powerhouse of dynamic, forward-thinking underground music’) also offered tips for blending in for those less practised at blending in to the counter-culture. ‘Everyone who’s anyone is welcome, even if you are an incorrigible stiff,” they promised. “So long as you know where the drudge stops and the fun starts, you’re OK with us. If you’re worried your job is laughably square and you won’t feel comfortable on the tastemaker laser-edge of post-millenial technoculture that is Hemsby-on-Sea, just do something self-consciously wacky,” they suggested, “Like wearing your tie around your head, Rambo style. Just do whatever feels natural.” “We don’t think many people live and work in the underground, apart from perhaps the teenaged mutant ninja turtles,” they continued. “Many people who attend BLOC have perfectly ordinary jobs, right the way through from lollipop men to vivisectionists. What makes you underground is liking the right kind of music – you can find out what the ‘right’ kind of music is from lifestyle websites and podcasts littered across Popular Culture. As a rough guide, if you can’t whistle it, girls hate it and no-one’s heard of it – You’re In,” they explained. http://www.blocweekend.com (14-16 March 2008: Article by Jonty Skrufff Subscribe to Skrufff music newsletter at www.Skrufff.com
|
