Tough Trannies Teach Thugs A Lesson

Homophobic bullies who were caught on CCTV trying to assault two transvestites were given community service orders this week, after their lawyer explained both had been drinking vast quantities of alcohol.

“You know it cannot have been a good night when you get into a fight with two cross-dressing men,” quipped defence lawyer Mark Davies told Swansea Magistrates’ Court, “Unfortunately they were extremely drunk (Daily Telegraph)

Much more hilariously, both thugs were smashed to the pavement by single punches thrown by one of the drag queens, both of whom happened to be cage fighters out on the town in Swansea dragged up.

“As they walked past me one said, 'Nice dress, gay boy'. He then threw a punch at me,” James Lilley, 22, told the Daily Mirror, “He was on the floor two seconds later. I don't take any nonsense from idiots like him.'

“It's a sorry state of affairs when a guy can't walk down the street in a mini-skirt and make-up without getting grief from some idiot,” fellow martial arts expert Daniel Lerwell agreed, “I had lipstick and eyeliner on and felt very proud of myself. I thought it looked particularly fetching.”

Even more hilariously, the entire incident was posted on Youtube ( much to the amusement of Sao Paulo drag artist Alisson Gothz.

“Actually I almost fainted after seeing this video, it’s soooo funny,” Alisson told Skrufff.

“You should never underestimate someone just because he's wearing a dress, darling! People always assume that gays are weak and submissive; well, think again,” she laughed.

Long recognized as one of Sao Paulo’s most flamboyant dressers, Alisson said she’s rarely encountered street violence in Brazil, revealing ‘the only time was in a subway station’.

“It didn't actually get 'physical' but I was ready to attack,” she chuckled, “Of course, my loud voice and my experience in insulting people until they are on the verge of crying did the job for me.”  She did, however, admit to dressing down to avoid trouble on occasion ‘mainly because of skinhead gangs’.

“Here in Sao Paulo they tend to walk around the streets early in the morning when all the clubbers are going back home, so you do need to pay attention,” she warned.

“It's always best to walk in groups, or at least with a friend, being careful to avoid dark and out of the way places. And when all else fails, always remember to wear high heels. They are truly weapons of mass destruction against jerks and thugs.”

In a bizarre postscript to the cage fighters dressed as trannies episode, Britain’s tabloids reported that celebrity ‘glamour model’ Jordan’s new boyfriend Alex Reid, is also an enthusiastic cross-dresser, going by the name of ‘Roxanne’.

"Roxanne is always throwing dinner parties for her friends while wearing her best gladrags (clothes),” a ‘friend’ told rival tabloid the Mirror.

"Roxanne is a lady who doesn't just sleep with anyone. In fact, he doesn't have sex as her at all - only as Alex,” the friend added.

A spokesman for the notoriously tough hardman later categorically denied the revelation, claiming Jordan issued the story as a publicity stunt for herself. The Daily Mail, meanwhile, posted an old photo of the fighter dragged up for a School Disco party, that the Sun said was a ‘lad’s night out’. (Alex Reid in fancy dress)  (Click here to see gay hating thugs Dean Gardener, 19, and Jason Fender, 22 meeting their match- fantastic!)

Article by Jonty Skrufff ( : Follow Jonty on Twitter:

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